Baby girl’s baptism takes place in mid-July. It’s gorgeous outside (and I realize that we haven’t been able to quite enjoy the nice weather this summer) but a bit too hot so we have the ceremony inside. So convenient with pastors in the family! Baby girl’s “momo” (my mom) is there and then it’s baby’s godmother and aunt, her uncle, cousins, dad’s nephew with wife and grandma and grandpa of course. They have made it so nice and special! This is such a nice break to just bask in the blessing of being this baby’s mother and to spend some quality time with family. The ceremony is beautiful and the dinner afterwards is so nice (bonus being sharing dessert with my little guy, him on my lap). We all happily chat as we eat and the event is altogether a success! Baby girl is baptized!
When we get home from the kids’ grandparents, it’s back to reality, practicing our new breastfeeding skills, summer school, work for husband, mom flying back to Sweden for my brother’s wedding which we can’t attend and a couple of more days of “the medication battle”.
The following week it’s time for baby’s four months checkup. I can’t believe she is already four months, 4!!! As we enter the doctors’ office, we get quite the surprise. Several doctors including my kids’, her nurse as well as other nurses and medical staff all stand up applauding us as we walk in. Baby has smiles for everyone even if mama is a bit embarrassed and confused by all the attention.
The nurse checking baby’s weight, height and head circumference tells us that everyone at the office was rooting for the poor bleeding baby girl. She confesses that the doctor had to consult her colleagues about what went wrong and why the silver nitrate didn’t stop the bleeding. The nurse herself had to tell the other nurses about the dramatic events when we came in late afternoon after a routine procedure and baby just wouldn’t stop bleeding. I’m actually glad they are being so supportive and I hope that we will get some answers in the end. The only thing I don’t like is baby’s diagnosis of blood disorder (not specified) in her medical chart.
The doctor is loving how little girl looks now, she has gotten her color back and her weight is in the 45 percentile. She even calls her “healthy looking”, which of course makes me very pleased. I bring up her inability to drink from bottles (only response “that little stinker”) and sleep at night (“it will come”). Since we no longer need the vaccination shots to go to Sweden, I decide to take them when baby is four months adjusted (when she would have been four months) instead of actual (how old she is right now). What I don’t like is the note that I (the parent of…) am refusing vaccination, because I wouldn’t do that, I have just read that it is better for baby to wait until she would have been “the right age”. Our daughter got a fever last time and slept for hours in a row (might seem like a much needed break but I just worried) so I pick to wait until she (hopefully) will be able to handle the vaccinations better.
It’s August and summer is almost over. Sleep how I miss you! I think I might turn crazy with sleep deprivation. As soon as baby’s mouth is better, she starts teething. She is literally up all night while sleeping way too much during the day. Everything is upside down and inside out. The problem with all the day sleeping is my son and his schedule. I think I might shoot the next person or article referencing “sleep when the baby sleeps”. Argh!!
The other huge frustration is the bottle. She will not take it! I’m asking my friends over the phone, on social media and in my parenting and breast feeding support groups. I try every single nipple “created to feel and taste like the real deal” but that’s just it, all baby want IS the real deal. You might think I would be happy now that we have gotten the hang of breast feeding and wasn’t that my goal after all? What the heck am I complaining about? It’s just that she still wants to eat all the time. To her I am a walking talking food source, pacifier, drink fountain and comforter all wrapped up into one. And nobody else can take her, I don’t mean feed her- although that’s certainly true as well, but take her. Seconds after my husband takes her she wants back to me, screaming, usually for more food!
I am extremely grateful that she is feeling better, I am, but that doesn’t mean I’m not exhausted. I call my mom and even my sister to complain (whom else would be there for you to listen to your negativity rants?)
In the middle of all of this I see an odd looking blistery, swollen sore under baby’s tongue, it seems like she has trouble swallowing and our boy brings home yet another cold from school. Both kids are home all week long, stuffy, whiny and congested which translated to even less sleep. Mama looks up at airplanes in the sky outside the window and secretly wishes just for a day or so to fly away alone, just to catch up on some sleep. Instantly regret it of course, hating myself for even thinking it! These kids really need me now, it’s time for this mom to step it up, channel some “I always wanted to a mom” energy, pull on my big girl (granny panty) underwear and get on with it!