The next week, I must have gotten some “mommy confidence back” because my son has an appointment (his very first) to the dentist and I’m taking him alone without any “back-up” with a whiny/teething almost six months old in tow. That’s not that big of a deal you say, lots of moms take both their kids lots of places. Then I would ask you this, are your kids as wild as my oldest not fully potty trained, prone to act out 3 year old? Is your youngest an infection sensitive, teething, nursing machine? AND did you consider the fact that I took them both to Chuck e Cheeses afterwards? Your answer now is probably “that was such an incredibly dumb decision but you have no one to blame but yourself”.
Our little boy does remarkably well (disregard the running away attempts and the broken toy train in the waiting room). I think he is a little intimidated by all the equipment and the unfamiliarity of the situation. He wants me close at all times and it’s difficult when you have a miserable baby (who is usually very sweet and never cries- except when hungry, and oh at the doctors) who wants to comfort eat nonstop. He plays with the stuffed animals and brushes the dinosaurs’ teeth. He sits on a stool x-raying his teeth (he looks so little and vulnerable) and he lays down in the dentist’s chair watching cartoons playing on the ceiling. You could have a worse dentist experience, don’t you think? I for one is not a big dentist fan, despite the fact that it took me 31 years to have a cavity (I guess I had way better teeth in Sweden or something).
Since he did so well and Chuck e Cheeses is right next door I decide against all odds to take a chance that this will go smoothly. What was I thinking?
Little boy gets super excited (jumping in place). He doesn’t actually play any of the games, he just puts the tokens in, laughs as the game turns on and then runs to the next one. Did I mention those tokens actually cost real money and that he runs from one game to the next in second and oh, that he never wants to leave? Fun times! Great plan!
On this particular day, we make it to ordering our food before it is tantrum central. “Yes I understand that you want to plaaaay, but mama is just getting you some fries and apple juice”. Two minutes later, said apple juice is all over the floor and all over my 3 year old. “Yes, thanks for asking, it is easy to try to clean up a very sticky mess of a boy in the bathroom who doesn’t want to get cleaned up (but rather go plaaay) while carrying a heavy baby. Some master juggling people! Of course I don’t have a change of clothes for him. Someone once hinted that I was a bad mom because I only had one change of clothes for my baby in my diaper bag, now I always bring two (and yes, I did take offense but the “tip” does come in handy every once in a while). Unfortunately my son is not size 3-6 months, nor is he a girl (not that that matters at all of course, but he might actually mind). All I have is a change of underwear, you know for potential accidents. There are already people in the restroom staring at my poor attempts to clean my son up while not dropping my baby girl. Well, whatever, leaving now would ruin the rest of the day and there is no arguing with a three year old so we leave the restroom to go plaaay!
I find a table while trying to keep an eye on my son who is already taking off running with his precious tokens (well at least he is having fun, now let’s try not to get kidnapped!). I plop the giant diaper bag down (hoping no one will steal my wallet- no we don’t live in a bad neighborhood but just saying, you never know) and take off following him. It’s a game of “run and seek”. It scares me that he is so fast and slippery- he just takes off without a backward glance. Next tantrum neatly co-insides with baby’s wails for more food. He is out of tokens-watch out people, this will turn into a full-blown “throw yourself on the floor cry fest” You are laughing now aren’t you? (An “I told you so on the tip of your tongue). Well, that is not all, the food gets cold (forget about me eating, need to diet anyways), the pizza gets thrown in my face, baby hits me with the “steel number flag” (ouch), someone (accidentally) steals my boys shoes and the “no ice cream” news isn’t well received. “Somebody” complains about my breastfeeding (in a private booth under a blanket) and the manager just “kindly asks that I cover up a little more to not offend the other guests”. Hello, is that even legal? And since when is feeding your starving (well, not so much) baby offensive? I never thought I would be that type of mom always with her boobs out nursing, but you know what? When you have a “nurse loving” baby like mine… and more than one kid, you can’t usually sneak away. Where are you supposed to feed your baby anyways, on the bathroom floor?
Maybe now you understand the challenge in taking BOTH kids to the dentist…
As we are trying to leave after a hellish hour and a half (I’m never coming back here, NEVER), my little sweetie runs off again. As I’m chasing him in a mad dash, crying baby on my stomach, huge pink diaper bag and all, I watch him as he falls. It’s bad, he crashes right into a wooden booth…just to fall backwards and hit his head on a huge metal platform holding a “ride on” horse. Lots of crying (my poor boy) lots of worrying, huge bump (already blue, but luckily no blood), people running for ice and telling me how bad the fall was (helpful, very helpful).
Thankfully, we get the go ahead to leave (I’m not kidnapping these kids no REALLY…our stickers and “UV tattoo thingies” do match). I’m somehow managing to carry BOTH kids, the baby carrier and the diaper bag out to the car, where I strap one in and feed the other one (again). The first one happily munchies on his ice cream (what did you expect? Me not granting a very hurt little boy his only wish? More like please stop crying so people stop staring and judging, sorry I’m not perfect). It’s Friday and I’m thankful for some weekend daddy “back-up” unfortunately our son is on a roll and the challenges keep coming…