Kid bullies, bare bottoms and broken lips…

Chaos erupts! My sister is calling to tell her nephew “happy birthday” so I put her on speaker (as he struggles to speak to her in Swedish) and I’m trying to overhear so I can “translate”. There are a couple of other kids in the indoor play area and one of them just doesn’t seem to be able to leave the baby alone. He pushes her and pinches her- she doesn’t cry (being used to her big brother) but seems distressed.

I try to be apart of my sister’s and son’s phone conversation while helping my daughter out but the other toddler does not make it easy. In these situations I always get confused (and a little upset), do I scold someone else’s child (he is being really rough with her and I already said “no, she doesn’t like that” multiple times nicely) or do you talk to the parents?
The mom is just standing there conveniently outside the heavy gate (so great and no “underage kid”- I’m not talking 21 here more like 8…10!? can open it) blatantly ignoring what is going on (even though I have tried to catch her eye…also several times.

I’m forced to remove my little girl from the situation which is not fair since she was having so much fun. She protests loudly (can you blame her…they had “real” books to chew on and lots of big boy toys!). My friend and I launch into a discussion about what you do when another kid is “bullying” (even though they are probably too young for that term) your own?

It is not like we have never been on the other end of this. Both our kids are headstrong and stubborn with at least in my son’s case a little “selfish” (what 3-4 year old child isn’t by the way) personality (me, me, me and mine). I have had my child hit someone, a grown-up, thank goodness (if you are said grown up still traumatized from the gymboree music class for 18 months olds a couple of years ago, I’m terribly sorry) with a big flashlight in the head, I have had him push a baby on the playground for “stealing” his toy, throw sand in someone’s eye because he wanted her toy etc. etc. But I pride myself in at least always always, interrupting, apologizing, sitting him down explaining what he did wrong, having him apologize and ultimately removing him from the situation.

I think my friend and I are on the same page at least until…

Smack!

Ok, my son is off the phone (now there did the cell go?) and on to..

Apparently throwing books on people, more specifically my friend’s sweet daughter. I hate seeing her cry, especially since it’s caused by MY son AND her lip is bleeding. Now this situation is definitely worse. It is so awkward and uncomfortable and sad and unnecessary (unfortunately it happens quite often). We are just lucky we are with friends and my friend is beyond understanding while her daughter is bleeding from her mouth. I apologize for my wild son of course but can’t help to add that I don’t think he meant it (and I don’t think he did, he would never want to hurt his “bestest girl”). His movements are just still so jerky and out of control.

Here comes the “we don’t throw” lecture, on my knees at his eye level. I can tell he is sad but I make him apologize and because he gets upset at me when he does wrong (oh the logic!) he throws another book. I have just about had it (the toddler pushing around my baby girl before seems like an angel in comparison).

I loudly and sternly announce that we are going to the car since he can’t behave. Too bad because we were having such a good time just moments earlier. I can tell he realizes throwing a second book was a bad move (well, good) and he apologizes to “his girl”.

The only problem remaining is the potty situation and as if my son knows that he can add some final drama before we call it a day… He promptly pulls his pants down before he even reaches the restroom (most of the people have left though which is a relief because I know all to well how people can get).

The door is wide open and his pants are around his ankles, trying to show his friend how it’s done! (Coming from a good place). Her lip seems (thankfully) better and she is over that and on to the next adventure of public restrooms. My son proudly announces “his number two” (which my friend confirms). Where am I you ask? Well I’m still inside of the heavy (kid proof) gate trying to find my phone, gather all of our belongings and my screaming baby.

I quickly realize that my son has pulled his pants back up directly after “pottying”, forgetting a step…

Now, where are those “free” wipes?

About jennym

A doctor of psychology and a mother of three writing about the struggles and joys and the ups and downs of motherhood, marriage, pregnancies, deliveries and her absolute love for her children in a humoristic yet down to earth weekly blog!

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